Portland Timbers Sign Diego Chara: Or, Your Colombian Is Not Better Than Our Colombian

The Portland Timbers have signed Colombian Diego Chará as the first designated player in the club's history. The midfielder, 25, joins the Timbers from Colombian first-division club Deportes Tolima, who finished first in the league last season. Chará will be welcomed by countryman Jorge Perlaza, who signed with Portland earlier this season.

Kudos to the Timbers for signing their first DP, but really, how Seattle Sounders - like can they get? Hello? A Colombian? To join another Colombian? If this isn't a case of little brother looking to emulate big brother, I don't know what is. Give it all you've got, Portland, but Chará and Perlaza will never come close to Fredy Montero and Jhon Kennedy Hurtado.

After all, does your Colombian DP play softball with a cast on his wrist, even stepping up to the plate to bat one - handed? I thought not.

The Portland Timbers play their first home match in MLS on Thursday, April 8 -- but it's never too early to start the Cascadia banter.

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